Learning to Grieve Your Losses in Spiritual Formation
What have you lost? Have you learned to grieve your losses? We might not like to think about that. We…
Spiritual Struggle
Facing the Internal Opposition to Becoming Whole: 3 Things to Do
Time for a reality check. If you haven’t sensed it already you soon will; your journey to becoming whole will…
The Hunger in the Human Heart: What Do You Want – Really?
We are needy creatures. For all the attempts many of us make to be independent and self-sufficient, it doesn’t work…
What If Feeling Bad Isn’t Always a Bad Thing?
Who wants to feel bad? I certainly don’t. There’s a whole list of feelings we usually consider “bad”: anxiety, anger,…
The Truth About Feeling Angry with God
We’ve often gotten it wrong in the church when it comes to anger at God. Many have believed feeling angry…
Training, Not Trying: The Secret to Spiritual Growth
Trying harder just wears you out. And trying to become like Jesus can feel especially discouraging. But there’s a very…
When Your Relationship Isn’t Working
There’s little if anything that makes a greater difference in your sense of wellbeing than the quality of your closest…
Faith and Healing After Relational Trauma: How to Move Forward
You have been deeply hurt in relationship. And you will also be healed in relationship. The trauma that comes when…
More Is Available Now—But It Still Never Feels Like Enough
We don’t like to wait. Especially in today’s instant-gratification culture where you can get Amazon Prime delivery in an hour,…
You Didn’t Choose Your Trauma, But You Can Choose Your Healing
Nobody wakes up one morning and says, “Today I think I’ll mess up my life and the lives of those…
The Battle for Your Brain: Technology and Spiritual Formation
Mental/emotional wellbeing and spiritual formation are not two separate things. Our sin problem is deeper than simply wrong acts that…
More Than Forgiveness: God’s Bigger Vision for Salvation
Clean as fresh-fallen snow. The debt you had no hope of ever satisfying – paid in full. Chains that had…
When You Might Need a “New God”
Let me be clear; you don’t get to have any God you want. You don’t get to make God in…
After Betrayal: Forgiveness, Boundaries, Reconciliation, and Trust
People will let you down. It might be an inadvertent misunderstanding, or it might be an intentional and destructive betrayal.…
If Your Christian Life Isn’t Working, Here’s What’s Missing
If you’ve been in church for any time at all, you know people who you wouldn’t want to spend an…
Let the Light In: Choosing Beauty and Goodness in a Dark World
You can’t get rid of darkness by raging against it; you must turn on the light. A bucket of dirty…
Is God Good? Healing your Connection with God
Is God good? Your initial response may be the one you learned in church or Sunday school; “God is good.…
Disappointed in an Empty Life: Is This All There Is?
Ever feel disappointed with your life, wondering Is this all there is? Get up and go to church. Serve on…
Transformation Starts Here: Following Jesus in Your Actual Life
What would following Jesus right now, today, look like? In the life you actually have. With the history, traumas, strengths,…
Do You Have the Same Effect on People that Jesus Did?
What’s it like to be on the other side of you? If you were your friend, husband, wife, child, employee,…
5 Ways You May Be Afraid to Change and What to Do About It
A husband I’ll call George feels paralyzed. He knows things aren’t well in his soul or in his marriage, but…
Purity: More About the Inside than the Outside
Some words are pregnant with emotional weight. Purity is such a word. At its best, it conveys the idea of…
How to Consecrate Your Sex Life to Jesus Daily
Many people who are seeking to follow Jesus struggle with their sexuality. You might be like Paul, doing what you…
What Does Sexual Wholeness Look Like?
What is Jesus inviting you into? Steve imagined a life of striving and trying harder, never feeling like he could…
You’re Not Too Far Gone: The Hope That Changes Everything
When the sun sets, how often do you worry that it’s gone forever? Probably never. If you’re sick or lonely,…
What Does Intimacy for Singles Look Like?
You’re not married. And you’re in good company. Unmarried adults now outnumber married adults in the US and in many…
4 Tensions to Manage so you can Experience Authentic Intimacy
I can’t be vulnerable; people will walk all over me. … People don’t like my honest self, so I have…
Intimacy Gone Wrong: the Biggest Obstacle to Connection with God
You were created in the image of God, with the need, desire, and capacity for intimacy. That need is part…
Lies That Kill Intimacy: Common Myths About Sex and Relationships
You learned things about intimacy, sex, and relationships long before you knew you were learning anything. What you saw modeled…
Five Reasons Why Intimacy Is Hard: What No One Tells You
One might think that something as vital to our wellbeing as intimacy is wouldn’t be so hard. But it is.…
When Church Hurts a Woman’s Relationship with God
Church should be the safest place on earth. The family of God should be the place where every single human…
How to Consecrate THAT Part of You to Jesus
Recently I mentioned a concept that got a lot of response; “consecrate that part of you to Jesus.” For whatever…
Messed Up Again? Use Your Slip to Fall Forward
Jesus loves repeat sinners. (Are there any other kind?) It’s not that slips are OK; they’re not. But what do…
The Lies, Wounds, and Empty Places that Messed You Up
The human heart is not a pretty place. At least not after living in this world for any length of…
How to Avoid Both Cheap Grace and Legalism
Does “Jesus loves you” mean you can get away with stuff? If not, who determines what’s OK and not OK?…
How Does God Feel About You?
With some frequency I ask people, “How do you feel God feels about you?” I’m not looking for an intellectual or…
Your Story Holds the Key: Find Deeper Intimacy with Yourself, Others, and God
Oh, how good we are at hiding! Humans have been practicing hiding ever since the Garden of Eden, and we’ve…
Don’t Confuse Sex and Intimacy: How They’re Related – and Different
We use euphemisms all the time, especially around sex. I’ll spare you a list. But did you know the Bible…
How to Recover from Sexual Harm
A wise person said to me recently, “I no longer ask ‘What’s wrong with me?’ I ask, ‘What happened to…
Sex and Intimacy When You’re Single – And Christian
If you’re a Christian and you’ve been in church, you’ve probably heard the message “sex is for marriage.” But you’re…
Overcome Your Complex Relationship with Sex, Intimacy, and God
Believe it or not, sex and all that comes with it affects you deeply. Your relationship with sex is complicated.…
The Power of Gratitude: Three Unique Blessings I’m Thankful For in 2024
Today is Thanksgiving Day in the United States. Research continues to demonstrate how gratitude is good for you; it improves…
How to Find “Your People” When You Need Help
Isolation is dangerous. But connecting is often hard. In my work with people this is almost always the most challenging…
Necessary or Unnecessary Suffering
Some Christians seem to believe God brings us suffering on purpose, to build our character. Others believe that following Jesus…
Answering Your Questions About Sex, Love, and Relationships
Today is different. I’m not sharing an article; I’m sharing some answers to questions you’ve sent in about sex, love,…
Trying to Stop Your Bad Behavior? Who Has Your Heart?
Ask ten people what sin is and you’re likely to hear about the ten commandments, the words God wrote with…
How to Live Well Even in the Face of Unfulfilled Longings
Perhaps some days start out good. You slept well, the sunrise is lovely, and your coffee tastes great. But sooner…
Deep Transformation: How to Become Different from the Inside Out
Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. You’ve probably heard that before. But you may find yourself…
Two Questions God Loves to Answer
God hears our prayers. And there are many different kinds of prayers; intercession, thanksgiving, repentance, asking for needs, spiritual warfare…
Why a Christian Can Expect Both Suffering And Breakthrough
As followers of Jesus we should have the most complete and accurate understanding of reality. We know what’s happening behind…
