Deep Transformation: How to Become Different from the Inside Out
Insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. You’ve probably heard that before. But you may find yourself…
Spiritual Struggle
Two Questions God Loves to Answer
God hears our prayers. And there are many different kinds of prayers; intercession, thanksgiving, repentance, asking for needs, spiritual warfare…
Why a Christian Can Expect Both Suffering And Breakthrough
As followers of Jesus we should have the most complete and accurate understanding of reality. We know what’s happening behind…
How Did We Get Here? Your Sexual Story Matters
When I talk with someone for the first time who’s asking for help I usually ask, “What’s your story? How…
5 Things I Wish the Church Knew About Single Christians
Many single Christians find the single life really difficult. And I’ve experienced that myself during the many years I lived…
Human Relationships: What People Can and Can’t Do For You
Loneliness is an epidemic. And it’s dangerous to your physical, mental, and spiritual wellbeing. God Himself said that aloneness was…
How People Change: Becoming Who You Were Meant to Be
I’m so glad I’m not like I used to be! I was a seriously messed up young woman. But I’m…
Healing After Betrayal: How to Rebuild Your Life and Move Forward
My friend had been betrayed. “It was a sucker punch in my gut.” I’m not sure there’s anything humans can…
How to Stand Firm and Overcome When Facing Spiritual Opposition
If all it took to experience wholeness were a few good facts in your left brain and a few pleasing…
From Hurt to Whole: The Power of Making the Choice to Heal
Time alone does not heal all wounds. Healing does not simply happen to you. God rarely “rains” healing down on…
From Temptation to Triumph: Designing Your Personal Escape Plan
Whatever your personal brand of “stuff,” especially sexual “stuff,” you can be sure you will be tempted again. The process…
Why Prayer is Not Enough: What to Do When You’re Still Struggling
For the follower of Jesus who is feeling close to Him, the words “prayer is not enough” may seem like…
What’s Required for Healthy Sexual Discipleship?
A spouse feeling hurt and lonely because their partner seems uninterested in sexual intimacy. A young (or not-so-young) person heavy…
Healthy Ways to Choose Intimacy: It Could be Dangerous
People are messy, and therefore relationships are messy. The closer you get to people the messier it gets. Your heart…
Three Steps to Becoming Whole After Being Sexually Harmed
Nobody wakes up one day and says, “Today I want to mess up.” You have a story. You came to…
Your Journey to Sexual Wholeness Will Be Opposed
I hear from people every day who are facing opposition on the journey to sexual wholeness. If all it took…
Sex, Love, and Intimacy; How do They Connect?
Sex, love, and intimacy are (or should be) related in some ways, but they’re not the same. Too often people…
What’s Your Story – Your Sexual Story?
Yes, you have a sexual story. Some of that story may be good, even very good. But if “good” described…
Four Big Lies About Sex, Relationships, and Intimacy
Many of the best lies are almost true; they contain just enough truth to give them plausibility. Such a lie…
Beyond the Valley: Moving Forward When You’ve Lost Trust in God
It didn’t require a genius to hear the pain in her words; “I’ve lost trust in God.” If you feel…
Ditch the Resolutions; Ask These Three Questions Instead
At the start of a new year there’s always talk of resolutions, SMART goals, turning over a new leaf, making…
What to Do About the Three Kinds of Suffering
You are suffering. Surprise! Welcome to the human race. And of course that’s not at all reassuring. Our culture trains…
Five Key Elements in the Process of Becoming Sexually Whole
Many of the people I talk with wish God would just “zap” them from their current state of misery and…
An Apology from the One Who Hurt You as a Man or a Woman
Who do you need an apology from? Who has wounded you? Our deepest hurts often come from those we “should”…
How You – and God – can Deal With Painful Regrets
Do you know anyone over 30 who has absolutely no regrets? I don’t. There’s stuff you experienced that you wish…
Boundaries and Freedom: Embracing What You Can and Can’t Do
You are not God. You are not all-powerful. Sometimes that’s a revelation; you are not the center of the universe.…
Three Characteristics of Toxic Religion
Do you ever get a queasy feeling when thinking about your church or ministry experiences? OK, you’re “supposed” to connect…
When God-Talk has Brought Pain to Your Sexuality
Love it or hate it, sex is a big deal. God cares about your sexuality, and the Bible has a…
When God Feels Distant: Nurturing Faith in the Absence of Answers
This world is messy and often confusing. How do you handle things when life is difficult? Sometimes you’re not seeing…
Does Sexual Sin Make You Disqualified? What’s Next?
The thief is always out to “steal, kill, and destroy,” (John 10:10), and sin is destructive. But sexual sin seems…
The Loneliness Epidemic Got You? How to Find Peace and Connection
You can feel lonely in a crowd or a friendship or a marriage, and you can feel perfectly happy and…
5 Wrong Assumptions About the Body, God, and Sexuality
Our assumptions color everything that comes after that. If your starting point is wrong, you’re going to be frustrated or…
Throwing Down the Idols of Marriage, Singleness, or Parenthood
Relationships are usually complicated. And the church has usually idolized one particular relationship status to the detriment of another. It’s…
Dealing with Lust and Redeeming Eros
Desire is a good thing. As Christian psychiatrist Dr. Curt Thompson says, humans are people of desire. Jesus often asked,…
How’s Your Soul Doing, Really?
At breakfast with a friend recently I asked her, “How’s your soul doing?” That led to conversation about some really…
Tearing Down Inner Walls so you can Experience Intimacy
The idea of intimacy sounds nice, even important. But most people don’t think of it as absolutely necessary for life.…
The 3 “C’s” of Growing in Sexual Wholeness
Time for a reality check. If you haven’t sensed it already you soon will; your growing in sexual wholeness (or…
What to Do When God’s “Truth” and Your Experience Collide
You “know” what’s right. Or you’re pretty sure you do. Then why does it feel so – wrong? Your head,…
How Your Relationship Status is Always Complicated
Perhaps the only good thing Facebook has ever done was to allow the relationship status “It’s Complicated.” And is there…
Why Healing from Intimacy Gone Wrong Requires Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a big deal. Your head knows Jesus forgives you, but your heart still wonders, especially when you keep…
How Sex Has Lost its Glory: Intimacy Gone Wrong
God created you for something good, a level of goodness we can only begin to imagine now. He built into…
5 Ways to Pray When You Keep Messing Up
You mess up. You ask God for forgiveness. Thankfully you’re forgiven! Then you mess up again, and the cycle continues.…
Beyond Bad Behavior: Get From Sobriety to Recovery to Redemption
Every addiction is a whole-person “disease.” The “thing” might be alcohol, pornography, sex, gambling, video games, or a multitude of…
When You’re Not Sure You Want to be (Sexually) Whole
Jesus asked a question we may sometimes think strange. He asked the man who had been lame for 38 years,…
What Were You Even Created For?
If you woke up this morning feeling that everything in your world is better-than-good and you’re fully satisfied, this article…
What You Can and Can’t Expect Church to Do for You
Church was Jesus’ idea. I pray your experience of church has been, is now, and will continue to be wonderful.…
Praying Joy over Your Marriage at Christmas
“Joy to the world.” “Tidings of great joy.” Christmas is a season of joy. Or that’s the way it was…
How to Celebrate Christmas When Life is Hard – Anyway
You have problems, and it might seem impossible to truly celebrate Christmas when things are this hard. But I’m quite…
How to Plan Your Way Through the Holiday Blues
I love the Christmas season, but it hasn’t always been that way. Some Christmases have been really really hard. I…
How to Experience God’s Presence in Your Past Trauma
We’ve all experienced “stuff.” No one comes through life unscathed. What’s in your bucket of stuff is different from what’s…
