What to Do When God’s “Truth” and Your Experience Collide
You “know” what’s right. Or you’re pretty sure you do. Then why does it feel so – wrong? Your head,…
transformation
Why Healing from Intimacy Gone Wrong Requires Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a big deal. Your head knows Jesus forgives you, but your heart still wonders, especially when you keep…
How Sex Has Lost its Glory: Intimacy Gone Wrong
God created you for something good, a level of goodness we can only begin to imagine now. He built into…
5 Ways to Pray When You Keep Messing Up
You mess up. You ask God for forgiveness. Thankfully you’re forgiven! Then you mess up again, and the cycle continues.…
Beyond Bad Behavior: Get From Sobriety to Recovery to Redemption
Every addiction is a whole-person “disease.” The “thing” might be alcohol, pornography, sex, gambling, video games, or a multitude of…
When You’re Not Sure You Want to be (Sexually) Whole
Jesus asked a question we may sometimes think strange. He asked the man who had been lame for 38 years,…
Unpacking What You Learned About Relationships and Intimacy
Your brain is a sponge, not a source. You may believe you’ve come up with an original thought, but that’s…
Practical Ways to Pursue Intimacy with God
God wants to be wanted. Isn’t that like you? Don’t you want to be wanted? What if your desire for…
The One Most Important Goal to Pursue This Year
Goals, resolutions, commitments, decisions, turning over a new leaf, a blank page – you may have a love-hate relationship with…
My Favorite Recommendations for 2022
Each December I love sharing with you some of my favorite things – books, podcasts, and organizations I’ve enjoyed reading,…
Why You’re Frustrated with One Encounter with Jesus
Most of us want the pill, not the journey. We want the magic formula to comfort and success, three easy…
How to Experience God’s Presence in Your Past Trauma
We’ve all experienced “stuff.” No one comes through life unscathed. What’s in your bucket of stuff is different from what’s…
What Your Need for Intimacy Tells You About God’s Plan
Personal relationships. Intimacy. Sex and sexuality. What first comes to mind when you hear those phrases? It might be privacy…
The One Thing that will Transform Your Relationship Starting TODAY
What grade would you give your marriage today? A+? Hallelujah! But perhaps it’s more like a D. There isn’t one…
Answering Your Questions About Relationships
There’s little, if anything, that makes a bigger difference in your sense of wellbeing than the quality of your closest…
Fully Alive Marriage: It’s Not What You Think
If you’re single, perhaps you imagine a Fully Alive marriage as one where your spouse anticipates your needs and fulfills…
Your Life Through the Lens of the Need for Intimacy
God created you with the need, desire, and capacity for intimacy. What have you done with that need for intimacy?…
Why God Created You for Intimacy
There’s something in the human heart that craves connection. We sense, perhaps unconsciously, that we are created for intimacy. That…
What if You Could Look Forward to Reading the Bible?
I sometimes ask people, “What things are you supposed to do as a Christian?” And “read the Bible” is always…
The Most Overlooked Obstacle to Maturity and Wholeness
We are an impatient people. Our contemporary culture has fueled our natural human tendency to go for instant gratification. We…
How to Make Jesus Irresistible to Others
As a follower of Jesus you care about the people around you. So how do you respond to your coworker…
What Jesus Cares About More Than You Doing the Right Thing
What Jesus cares about most is not people doing the right thing. Does that surprise you? Certainly every human being…
Why Religious Activity Misses the Goal of the Christian Life
Why do you go to church, read your Bible, or pray? Why try hard not to sin? To feel better?…
The Primary Purpose for which God Created Marriage
This is not what you signed up for. The things you expected marriage to be turned out to be wrong,…
Why Church and Devotions Aren’t Working for You
Is what you’re doing as a Christian bringing the results you need, want, or expect? And while we’re talking about…
God Has an Answer for Your Fear and Anxiety
You’ve prayed. Maybe you’ve fasted, and cried, and asked others to pray for you. But the swirling thoughts and anxious…
Your Brain CAN Change
When I went through medical school back in the “dark ages” we were told that 50% of what we learned…
How Managing Your Anxiety can Transform Your Marriage
You know you’re not at your best when you’re stressed out, anxious, or afraid. And your internal state doesn’t just…
Stressed or Anxious About Your Marriage?
“Well, YES!” That’s kind of a given, right? Marriage hooks you to another sinner physically, emotionally, financially, even spiritually. Your…
What do Unafraid, Worry-Free People Know that You Don’t?
You don’t want a completely stress-free life. Not really. But don’t some people seem to handle it better than others?…
Experiencing the Resurrection Power of Jesus in Your Marriage
When Jesus came and lived, died, and lived again He did so to bring restoration and life to not only…
What Telling Your Story Does for You and Others
Darla wanted to hide. She’d been doing it all her life. Her story was a difficult one, and she’d gotten…
Getting Rid of the Trash Your Marriage Has Accumulated
Each week the trash truck hauls off the debris you accumulate in your home and most of us rarely if…
5 Things I Wish the Church Taught About Marriage
Is your church serving your marriage and relationship well? Are you satisfied with what the church has taught about marriage?…
What’s Your One Thing for 2022?
Resolutions can sometimes help, though just making a New Year’s resolution is likely to last about as long as your…
Pastor’s Marriage and Ministry Restored
John is a pastor. He loves being a pastor. He loves being the husband to his wife and the father…
How Gratitude Transforms Your Marriage
Thanksgiving comes this week in the United States. Many research studies demonstrate how intentional gratitude can improve your mental and…
When You Need an Attitude Adjustment
A couple days ago I could feel the tension rising in my body. My mind was ruminating on all the…
Does Your Life Smell Like Jesus Yet?
Fragrance is a delicate thing that’s hard to put words to but impossible to ignore. Freshly brewed coffee. Freshly baked…
What is the Measure of Success for a Christian?
You’re committed to following Jesus. How’s it going? If your life continued on the trajectory it’s on now, would you…
Ways to Find Hope from Impossible Marriages that Survived
Marriage is both beautiful and hard. Sometimes it seems impossible. In today’s world we constantly see marriages ending. That may…
The Dangers of Rule-Based Christianity
Rule-based Christianity is dangerous. Doubt that? Surely at some point you’ve had a parent or teacher or boss or leader…
What Beautiful Thing Do You Want to Create in Your Marriage?
You are creative. You cannot be otherwise! You were made in the image of God, who by nature is the…
How to Have an Encounter with God
A few years ago I was privileged to travel to Bangalore, India. Hundreds of thousands of Christians from all over…
How Identity Leads To Behavior: Who You Are to What You Do
Why do you do what you do? Why do you work out, or keep a clean house, or go on…
Five Steps to Building Better Intimacy in Marriage
God built into you the need, desire, and capacity for intimacy. It’s part of how you are created in His…
How Authentic Christianity Moves From Religious Activity to Following Jesus
Imagine you’re a marketer for Christianity. What does being a Christian involve? OK, here we go. You get up early…
Are You Taking the Next Steps Toward Transformation?
You know things aren’t yet the way they should be. Perhaps you’re frustrated and discouraged. You’ve prayed, and things don’t…
Five Ways Helping Others Helps You
Aren’t you grateful for what Jesus has done in you? You may have a lot more to grow to get…
How to Celebrate Your Transformation Before You’re Done
How is your life different because of Jesus? You don’t have to be “done” to celebrate your transformation! You didn’t…
