A Woman’s Beauty and Strength: Dangerous or Delightful?
Can we talk? Just you and me, girlfriend? A woman’s beauty is one source of her strength. But everything depends…
change
How to Find Healthy Motivation to Change
You know you should, but you just don’t. Perhaps for you that means you know you should lose weight, reign…
When Judgmental Christians Hurt You
You’re trying to do good. Or at least you want to. Really, you do. You believe (at least most of…
Do You Know How God Works With You?
How does God work with you? Do you know? How do you hear His voice? How do you understand what…
Why You Must Find Your WHY
Brianna sat down to chat yesterday. Her second child is nine months old, and she and her husband are planning…
The Single Most Important Way to Avoid Bad Advice
Learning from people who have experienced the same challenges you have is awesomely wise. It’s one of the most productive…
Anxiety can be Good for You
Anxiety is a very unpleasant feeling. Your heart may race. Your stomach may be in knots. You may have trouble…
Keys to Overcoming Opposition In Your Mission
There’s a popular myth – perhaps unspoken – that says everything should be easy if you’re doing the right thing.…
When Good People Do Bad Things
Many in the popular media seem to relish exposing “skeletons in the closet” whenever an individual or a group that…
Why Do Some People Beat the Odds?
Why do some people beat the odds and others don’t? Some people remain stuck. Their addictions are just as strong…
17 Things to say NO to this New Year
There’s no true difference between 11:59 pm tonight and 00:01 tomorrow morning. For some it will be a moment to…
What To Do When You Don’t Feel Like Reading the Bible
There’s that little voice in your head that says, “Read the Bible!” Intellectually you accept the fact that as a Christian, reading the Bible would be a good thing to do. But you don’t feel like it.
Here are a few thoughts on what to do at those moments when you just don’t feel like reading the Bible.
10 Excuses That Won’t Work With God
God is as eager to bless you, heal you, give you good things, or fulfill a big purpose in your life as a father or mother is to give good things to their children. (Matthew 7:11) Most of what He wants for you is bigger and more eternal than you could imagine for yourself.
But too often we humans are so short-sighted, selfish, or afraid that we don’t take advantage of what God offers. It’s like a child afraid to get onto a bicycle or jump into a swimming pool. The joy of swimming or riding a bike is waiting for you, but it takes being willing to risk, and trusting that your parent (God) will be there.
The Ripple Effect: How One Lifestyle Change Creates Another
Making lifestyle change takes a lot of effort. And it can get discouraging at times. Setbacks are common. Your original motivation becomes cloudy. Is all that effort really worth it?
But when you start to notice benefits in other areas, it may be easier to find the motivation to stick with the change you know is important. Here are a few ripples that are easy to understand:
5 Things to be Angry About
It’s good to be angry! If you are not angry at intolerable evil, you will never have the motivation to do something about it. It’s good to be angry! If you are not angry at intolerable evil, you will never have the motivation to do something about it.
Here are some things I hope each of us is angry about:
7 Benefits of Healthy Living Beyond Being Healthy
For many people, lessening the risk of disease or living longer is a rather boring, un-spectacular motivation for maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
Understanding more of the “other” benefits of healthy living can help us find more of the motivation necessary to actually make those healthy lifestyle choices. Here are some of those benefits.
The Journey From Being Squeezed to Thriving
We don’t like being squeezed! Just the thought of it is uncomfortable.
When some people get squeezed they become bitter, angry, and isolated. And other people take those times of being squeezed and leverage them into an opportunity for growth. What makes the difference?
Here are some critical steps that can take you from being squeezed to thriving on the other side.
What Do You Want?
It’s one of the first questions I ask a patient who comes to see me: “What do you want us to accomplish together?” So much frustration, misunderstanding, disappointment, and upset feelings can be avoided by getting this clear up front.
Clarifying what you want dramatically increases your chance of getting it. Even Jesus followed this when talking with people.
What God Will NOT Do For You
There are a few things God will not do for you. We human beings sometimes presume on God’s grace and think that will excuse our bad behavior.
So don’t be angry with God when you experience some “natural consequences.” Do seek God for His grace in changing your character.
No More Conversation!
Talking is good. Communication is even better. Having a good conversation warms the hearts of friends and improves understanding when people disagree. But talk is cheap!
Waiting until there are no obstacles guarantees that nothing will be done and nothing will change.
The Benefits of Anxiety
Anybody out there want to be anxious? Probably not.
Anxiety is a very unpleasant feeling. Your heart may race. Your stomach may be in knots. You may have trouble sleeping and trouble concentrating.
But there IS something very positive about anxiety. And that comes in the process of change.
5 Times to NOT Care What Anyone Thinks
I might not say it in quite those words, but it’s really true: “I don’t care what you think!” In fact it HAS to be true, or I’m no good to you or anybody else.
For a people-pleasing person like me, that conclusion is a hard one to come to.
Here are some specific situations where it’s important to NOT care others think:
A Response to Recent Election Results
Along with millions of others I was watching the election returns on TV Tuesday night.
Different generations ARE going to see things differently. Their cultural understanding is different. Certainly there must be principles, ways of communicating, person-to-person connections, that can help make the most important things relevant for those in every culture even now.
Doctor, Doctor: Your Family of Origin
You can’t choose your parents. Or your brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles, and cousins. If your family of origin was reasonably healthy you probably don’t think much about how you choose to relate to them.
But not all families are so healthy. It seems some significant measure of dysfunction is the norm in most families. Where you come from affects you.
5 Tips For Growing Up
Have you ever grown up in some significant way when everything was easy?
Probably not.
There’s the cliché that says, “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.” I don’t believe that’s always true. Sometimes trauma can stunt our growth: child abuse, rape, severe poverty, and others.
I DO know that the times when I’ve grown the most have definitely been some of the most difficult.
A Big Enough Reason
Making a change is hard. Habit, routine, addiction, convenience, or a thousand other reasons keep us doing the same thing over and over again, even if it’s terribly unhealthy. Or dangerous. Or even deadly.
It takes a big enough reason to endure the anxiety, setbacks, difficulty, or even pain that may be involved in making a lifestyle change. Sometimes that reason is positive, where the outcome you wish is enticing enough to work hard for. Sometimes that reason is negative, where the pain of remaining where you are is big enough to force a change.
A Time for Everything
The Byrds sang it: “A time to every purpose under heaven.”
I wonder how many people who still sing Turn! Turn! Turn! realize that the lyrics were taken essentially word-for-word from the Bible, Ecclesiastes ch. 3. It talks about a truth that those of us who live in this super-charged ultra-fast over-connected society often forget.
I Can’t Change Your Life
Sometimes you hear someone say, “You changed my life!” Perhaps you’ve said it to someone yourself. But mostly that’s a…
I HOPE I’ve Changed!
Change can feel threatening, especially to those looking on. I’m sure you’ve heard some variety of the saying, “The only…
