Oh, to be wholehearted! That’s the way it was with Adam and Eve in the Garden. No wars going on within their soul. No parts of them trying to control other parts, or working hard to keep some feelings hidden, or figuring out which version of themselves to put in charge today. What must that have been like?

But of course all that changed when sin entered. And in addition to all the other mayhem evil has caused, we are at war with ourselves. We are fractured, double-minded, and anything but wholehearted. We need to be put back together again.

Integration comes from the word integer; single, whole, without division or fractional parts. One of the key things Jesus is working to do in us is to accomplish our re-integration. It would not be an overstatement to see our whole Christian journey as one of increasing integration of our whole being. We were whole in the mind of God before our creation, and He will not stop His work in us until we become whole again.

Wouldn’t that feel like relief – to be integrated and whole, with no fractured parts? On our own we usually seek to accomplish that by trying to remove the parts of us that cause us problems, that carry sadness or pain or fear. But Jesus has a different plan.

So let’s consider our different parts, and what it looks like to be put together again.

Our Fractured Souls

Hebrew anthropology, the way ancient Israelites thought of and spoke of our nature as human beings, was much more wholistic than our contemporary perspective. The idea of shalom (often translated peace) was the idea of wholeness, nothing broken, nothing missing. Later Greek philosophy separated our human nature into separate parts, considering some parts good and some bad.

Modern psychology has developed various ways of thinking about our different parts. We understand a lot neurobiologically about what happens in a human soul as a result of trauma, dysfunctional family dynamics, and all sorts of unhealthy human systems. Internal family systems, inner child theory, attachment theory, and more are all attempts to explain our fractured souls and offer a path to more healing – and integration.

That may all be helpful in many ways. I use those ideas regularly. But you don’t have to geek out on neurobiology to sense that you are less than whole on the inside, and that all your attempts to make yourself whole end up in some blend of hiding, exhaustion, and frustration. And the harder you try to get rid of certain parts, the more they trouble you.

Many Christians might imagine that saying Yes to Jesus magically makes all our disrupted parts whole again. It is true that “if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation” (2 Corinthians 5:17)! Hallelujah! But that doesn’t mean your fractured soul is instantly re-integrated. That takes a process.

What Integration Looks Like

Jesus doesn’t want to remove the troublesome parts from you; he wants to redeem them. As a kintsugi artist, He brings all those parts together and restores them into a beautiful integrated whole. He doesn’t excise your trauma, your inner child, your tendency to hide, or your controlling nature from you; He transforms them and integrates them into something more valuable and radiant than it could have ever been before.

We can see this in the New Testament:

• The woman we know as “the woman at the well” used her influence in the town to become the first evangelist (John 4:28-30)
• Peter, once impulsive and quick to speak, became a bold and eloquent witness for the resurrection of Jesus (Acts 4:13)
• Saul, the one who wreaked havoc on the followers of Jesus, became Paul, the one who wreaked havoc on the pagan strongholds of the kingdom of darkness (Acts 17:2-6)

For you and me, this might look like:

• Your anger that had wounded everyone around you is turned into passion for helping those who have been exploited and have no one to fight for them
• Your people-pleasing that had made you unreliable and ineffective is turned into an empathy and care that draws others closer to Jesus
• Your longing for life that had been hijacked into various addictions becomes an infectious joy by which others are uplifted

As Jesus does His work in you, each part is healed. Each part becomes right-sized and takes its rightful place in your soul. You come to lovingly lead all aspects of your inner being from the Holy-Spirit-indwelt core of who you are. Instead of sounding like multiple street gangs fighting turf wars, your soul comes to resemble an orchestra playing a glorious symphony.

The Journey to Integration

So, how do we get there?

Honesty and compassion. That’s the way Jesus looks at your fractured soul, and it’s the way we need to come to see ourselves as well. No pretending things are better than they are, but refusing to see any part of us with self-contempt.

What about the evil we see when we look at our hearts? Let me encourage regular moments of prayerful discernment. Ask Jesus often, “How do You see me? Is this something evil for which I need deliverance? Is this something sinful for which I need to repent? Might this be a fractured part of me that needs healing and integration?” He will tell you. That kind of prayer is what Psalm 139:23-24 is about.

Most of the integrating work Jesus does in us is slower than we might wish. Our job is to consistently bring our souls into His presence. He is gracious, but He is also persistent. His presence will shine the light on the places still fractured in our being.

That looks like:

• Keep showing up. It usually takes significant time for old brain pathways to be rebuilt and new brain pathways to become the default. Keep placing yourself where Jesus is doing His work; time alone with God, deeply connecting with other believers, taking in healthy soul nourishment.
• Keep saying Yes. Whenever the Holy Spirit puts His finger on some fractured place in your soul, allow Him access. Just say Yes. He knows the speed and order with which you need to deal with your “stuff.” And then keep saying Yes.

You can trust Him with the work He wants to do in your soul.

Keep showing up. And keep saying Yes.

Your turn: Where are you less than whole-hearted? What parts are you trying to keep hidden, or get rid of? What might Jesus be saying to those parts?  Leave a comment below.

Want more? This week’s podcast is with Katie Kelley about finding grace in every part of your life. So encouraging.  Listen or watch.

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• We are less than whole-hearted. Jesus does not remove the troublesome parts of you; He puts you back together, working to heal, transform, and integrate those parts into a beautiful whole. Tweet that.

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